held

"Most of us has experienced the death of our love one,
or we watched somebody that we know or love,
experienced the pain of losing somebody that they love...

Maybe this is even happening to some of you right now,
or to somebody that you know in your circle of your friends,
at school or at work, maybe inapproriate...

My friend Christa Well wrote this song,
after she had lost two people very dear to her in the span of 48 hours...

I recorded this song,
in the prayer and hopes that it'll bring comfort to a lot of people...

The first time I heard it...
honestly it just made me to tears...

Christa found a lot of comfort in it's message,
and my prayer and hope is that you will too."

- Natalie Grant -


Very recently, I was struggling with mix feeling for a couple of time in a single short span of moment. For a moment, I was in a very good mood. But the next moment you know, you have no reason to be happy...

While I share the happiness and witnessed the union of many of my friends around me towards a new chapter of their life, I have heard of bad or not so good news about people around me too...

There is one night I got an sms from a uni friend, annoucing her marriage with her husband, whom I know too. I am excited and happy about it, because for ages, I havent seen them and many of friends that probably will be there too.

However, the next early morning, I got another sms that a friend of mine has lost his father... I am totally lost of what to tell or how to respond. Starting the day with a sad news doesnt feel great, but it is insignificant as compared to my friend's feeling. Only until the end of that day, I finally managed to send him a message expressing my condolence...

This post and song are dedicated to Ming Yang who lost his beloved father, and to Coach/Sir Eng who lost his wife fighting cancer...

Two months is too little.

They let him go.

They had no sudden healing.

To think that providence would

Take a child from his mother while she prays

Is appalling.

Who told us we'd be rescued?

What has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares?

We're asking why this happens

To us who have died to live?

It's unfair.

This is what it means to be held.

How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

And you survive.

This is what it is to be loved.

And to know that the promise was

When everything fell we'd be held.

This hand is bitterness.

We want to taste it, let the hatred know our sorrow.

The wise hands opens slowly to lilies of the valley and tomorrow.

This is what it means to be held.

How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

And you survive.

This is what it is to be loved.

And to know that the promise was

When everything fell we'd be held.

If hope is born of suffering.

If this is only the beginning.

Can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior?

This is what it means to be held.

How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

And you survive.

This is what it is to be loved.

And to know that the promise was

When everything fell we'd be held.