dilemma

It has been a very long time since I am in a dilemma, and would never thought of myself in such situation again, especially tonight *_*

The truth is, my ex (not the ex-company ex), is getting married real soon, and I am invited.

I really cant make up my mind, to attend or not to attend...

It took me a very long time just to sign the online guest book just now, and am not sure how long it gonna take me tonight just to reply her email later... argh...

Don't get me wrong, I am very happy to see her taking the next step of reunion with her soul partner in life, who love her a lot.

But the thing is, I am very very embarrassed and cant imagine of showing my face there at the wedding dinner, for the guilt that I could still remember for breaking the relationship that cost her confidence until this very day, an obvious thing that I could sense from her wedding proposal story on the web *_*

much contemplating needed ... I deserved this moment *_*